Modern Version

Wow, before I post this modern version of the story of Jesus @ the dinner party of Simon the pharisee. I do want to give credit where credit is due. First I am sorry I sent a link to my blog to a few of my friends right after I put up the diva humor, unfortunately one of them didn't make it there until after I had posted the last couple of sad posts, but she did however after so much crying yesterday that I had a headache I got Andreas email in which she was very loving and comforting to me, she has been my Friend since about a year after I moved here 11 years, also I called my best friend of 30 years Gloria yesterday because her friendship Love is always a light in the darkness. Then i had some emailing back and forth with my cyber-best friend from the poetry board in which she shared some stuff that was going on with her and expressed caring for my situation she has been such a wonderful presence in my life. and one of the people from my 12 step group replied to an email I sent with words of friendship and even though we haven't shared that deeply this person has made an effort to be a friend and is one of the few who didn't practically totally ignore me on facebook, and while I'm on that group the ones who've gone to the movies with me etc. I appreciate. Okay now on to Amy's modern version of Jesus at the dinner party which made Gloria laugh and she asked me to send her a copy:

A certain Pharisee named Simon, invited Jesus to a dinner party at his house probably as a spectacle or amusement of his guests or so they could cross-examine him to get something to use against him. While he's there at this elegant dinner party, full of people of good social repute and etiquette, a low-life hooker from town, a social outcast, a social illiterate, unskilled in the social graces, and ignorant of all the higher society rules of proper shallow social interaction, has the nerve to crash the party, and not only does she have the nerve to crash the party, full of self-righteous backstabbing shallow people of good repute, she has the nerve not to play the shallow party game properly.
She's down on the floor, like a pathetic grovelling loser, crying all over his feet, and wiping her dirty tears off with her hair , ew!
Well! I can only tell you how shocked, appalled, and offended, all those socially skilled people of good repute were, with her disgusting display of inappropriate behavior!! Simon is thinking, "by golly we've got him now, will you look at this shit!!!"
Jesus, who knows all their thoughts, rolls his eyes, sighs and says, "Simon, dude let me tell you a story!" Simon in mock graciousness says, "oh please do tell" with sarcasm reeking in his tone!!!. Jesus says, "There was this guy, who was too generous for his own good, you know the kind with more money than sense, he loans money to these two poor smucks with rotten credit, who no banker in his right mind would loan a dime to. Well surprise surprise, when it comes time to pay up neither can cough up the cash. Do you know what the silly nerd does?! He forgives both of them!!! Well, you gotta know they LOVE this guy! but which one do you think loves him more, the one he loaned $500 to or the one he loaned $5000 to?"
Simon says " Well duh! the one he loaned $5000 to." Jesus says "okay I've got another story for you" Simon rolls his eyes and say "ummmhmmm" meanwhile he's thinking, "God, what do people see in this guy??!!"
Jesus says, " you see this hooker on the floor , making an ass of herself crying all over my dirty feet and wiping them off with her hair?" Simon says nothing but gives Jesus the look that says "Do I look like I'm blind?!!!" Jesus smiles and says " her life which is basically a big series of one mistake after another, including coming here tonight ignoring all the rules of polite shallow social engagement, and being for real with me about how she feels about her life! She's got an honest and loving heart, and she knows what is more important than a bunch of silly shallow social conventions, which by the way now that we are on that topic. . .when I arrived here tonight, you made clear by omission under what hostile terms i was invited! You gave me no water to wash the dust from my feet, no kiss, and you did not anoint my head with oil, a customary welcome, that even the lowest on the social scale know and practice to properly welcome and not insult their guests. This woman, for all her social ineptitude, let me know just how welcome I was in her heart, when she wept on my feet dried them with hair, kissed my feet and anointed them with an ointment she had to save up her money for. She totally humbled herself before me offering no self-righteous justification of herself. Every one of that long series of mistakes we call her life are forgiven!!! but as for those whose hearts are only filled with caustic comments, and self-deceptive self-righteous justification, Who deny that they even need forgiveness, well, there's no room in their hearts for that forgiveness, and who is going to give you what you deny even needing?"